That's the famous McDonald's phrase, is it not? Tell me...exactly what is 'it' everyone is lovin'? Could it be the chronic diarrhea and stomach cramps that come directly after eating their grease-dripping, half assed sandwiches? Maybe 'it' refers to the way the employs seem to hate their job and take their anger out on the customers. Wait...'it' COULD be how the employees never wear gloves when handling the food. Or the way they fuck up every single order. Let me tell you about MY personal experience with this shitty franchise.
EVERY single time I go, they fuck up my order. One time, it had been the last straw, so I logged on to their website to tell them exactly what I think of their service. I wrote a lengthy, strong-worded letter about their employees, their service, their food, etc. But of COURSE when I went to submit the damn letter, an error kept popping up, telling me to fill in the date, and every time I tried to do so, it wouldn't allow me to type anything in the given space. "Fuck it!" I thought, closing out of the website and calling their customer service line. What good did that do? It didn't do any good at all. They were closed and some stupid ass automated voice was telling me their hours of operation but I didn't give a shit. I wanted to complain right then and there so that they could hear how pissed I was about their service. If I waited until the next day to call, the rant wouldn't be as heart-felt and the point wouldn't get across.
So "I'm lovin' it" MUST refer to people loving being fucked by McDonald's.
I, personally, think their little phrase should be "McDonald's, expect to get fucked" and instead of the gay ass little yellow arches on top of their signs, it should just be a giant erection with a devious smile, pointing out at everyone.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
What's That Aboot, Eh?
Ok, I'm sure this is old news, but this is a new blog, therefore, this subject is something I want to discuss.
What the HELL is up with Canada's new speed bumps? They're an optical illusion of a child.
This...is the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard of, for a couple of reasons:
A: People might try to swerve to "miss" the child and freak out even more as they feel the "bump bump" under their tires.
B: Drunk people [or just idiots] might see an actual child in the road and think it's just a speed bump and run it over.
Whoever thought this up is officially the world's biggest dumbass. Obviously this wasn't a well thought out plan. Maybe Canada should stick with what they know best, Ice Hockey.
[Sorry tonight's post is so short. I just haven't been exposed to any douche bags today. Maybe they've all started hibernating...we can only hope]. :]
What the HELL is up with Canada's new speed bumps? They're an optical illusion of a child.
A: People might try to swerve to "miss" the child and freak out even more as they feel the "bump bump" under their tires.
B: Drunk people [or just idiots] might see an actual child in the road and think it's just a speed bump and run it over.
Whoever thought this up is officially the world's biggest dumbass. Obviously this wasn't a well thought out plan. Maybe Canada should stick with what they know best, Ice Hockey.
[Sorry tonight's post is so short. I just haven't been exposed to any douche bags today. Maybe they've all started hibernating...we can only hope]. :]
Monday, September 27, 2010
[Im]Patience is a Virtue?
I'm quite sure the phrase goes "Patience is a virtue" but I could be wrong, considering how impatient everyone is these days.
Today I was at a red light to go straight, the arrow turned green for cars turning left, and as a red car began to do so, a silver SUV [speeding through a red light] crashed into the red car, causing a huge wreck. The SUV's whole front end was totally destroyed, the windshield busted, and the red car's hood looked like an accordion and smoke billowed from the engine. Later, an ambulance arrived and had to whisk the people away to the hospital and both vehicles were completely totaled. So congratulations, Impatient SUV Driver! Completely destroying your car and having to be rushed to the hospital definitely beats sitting at a red light for a few minutes! You win the Boomer's Dumbass of the Week Award! I know, it's only Monday, but I feel confident that no one will surpass this moment of utter impatience and stupidity, and if they do, we'll just have a tie.
Today I was at a red light to go straight, the arrow turned green for cars turning left, and as a red car began to do so, a silver SUV [speeding through a red light] crashed into the red car, causing a huge wreck. The SUV's whole front end was totally destroyed, the windshield busted, and the red car's hood looked like an accordion and smoke billowed from the engine. Later, an ambulance arrived and had to whisk the people away to the hospital and both vehicles were completely totaled. So congratulations, Impatient SUV Driver! Completely destroying your car and having to be rushed to the hospital definitely beats sitting at a red light for a few minutes! You win the Boomer's Dumbass of the Week Award! I know, it's only Monday, but I feel confident that no one will surpass this moment of utter impatience and stupidity, and if they do, we'll just have a tie.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Caught Driving While Douche Bag
Douche bags...the world's full of them and I knew they wouldn't let me down tonight as I ventured to my mother's to watch the new episode of Dexter [since I don't get Showtime].
Let me begin by saying this...if you're driving at night and can see a car ahead of you in the distance, turn off your fucking brights! If I can see YOU, I know you can see ME! So be respectful and turn the damn things off. And another thing...if you're driving, put your damn cell phone DOWN! DON'T TOUCH IT! Is reading or sending a stupid ass text that reads "Lol" or "yeah" really worth your life? Well if you're pathetic enough to use your cell phone while driving, maybe it is.
Also, why the hell do people eat while they drive? I'm not talking about just a little candy bar or anything like that, I'm talking about whole fuckin' McDonald's meals. I've seen people stuffing their faces with Big Macs while driving down the highway. Just couldn't wait to get home and cook a real meal?
Today's people are so impatient, lazy, and just plain stupid. I could rant for hours but I'm getting pissed again just talking about these idiots.
On another note [a review], tonight's premiere of season 5 of Dexter was very good. Dark, emotional, dramatic. I don't want to be a spoiler so I'll just say that a couple of people in the show made some stupid decisions and I can't wait to tune in next Sunday and see what happens. If you missed the episode tonight, don't worry, tomorrow you should be able to watch it on http://www.ch131.com/
Goodnight.
Let me begin by saying this...if you're driving at night and can see a car ahead of you in the distance, turn off your fucking brights! If I can see YOU, I know you can see ME! So be respectful and turn the damn things off. And another thing...if you're driving, put your damn cell phone DOWN! DON'T TOUCH IT! Is reading or sending a stupid ass text that reads "Lol" or "yeah" really worth your life? Well if you're pathetic enough to use your cell phone while driving, maybe it is.
Also, why the hell do people eat while they drive? I'm not talking about just a little candy bar or anything like that, I'm talking about whole fuckin' McDonald's meals. I've seen people stuffing their faces with Big Macs while driving down the highway. Just couldn't wait to get home and cook a real meal?
Today's people are so impatient, lazy, and just plain stupid. I could rant for hours but I'm getting pissed again just talking about these idiots.
On another note [a review], tonight's premiere of season 5 of Dexter was very good. Dark, emotional, dramatic. I don't want to be a spoiler so I'll just say that a couple of people in the show made some stupid decisions and I can't wait to tune in next Sunday and see what happens. If you missed the episode tonight, don't worry, tomorrow you should be able to watch it on http://www.ch131.com/
Welcome
Sit down, shut up, and pay attention to this introduction. I'm easy to get along with, if you're not a complete douche bag. I always voice my opinions and mean everything I say, unless I'm being sarcastic [which I am 90% of the time]. And if you're already getting offended by this, stfu and leave, this blog isn't intended for pansies. This site may piss you off, but only if you take everything seriously. Honestly, I'm doing this blog for fun to give people a place to rant about anything, to blow off steam, to laugh and have fun, as well as read reviews on books, movies, tv shows, games...and so on [not that anyone gives a shit about my opinion] :]
So now...sit back, relax, and let the ranting begin. I'd start a nice rant right now but I don't feel like it. Check back a little later. I'm about to go out and I'm sure I'll run into quite a few douche bags that'll get my blood pumping and give me something to write about when I get home.
So now...sit back, relax, and let the ranting begin. I'd start a nice rant right now but I don't feel like it. Check back a little later. I'm about to go out and I'm sure I'll run into quite a few douche bags that'll get my blood pumping and give me something to write about when I get home.
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